Monday, October 3, 2016

2nd Tier Missions

I often ask myself why I don't post blog entries as often as I did when we first came to Africa.  One reason I don't post as often is laziness, probably.  Another is simply being "too busy" (which is a poor excuse, as we all have the same 24 hours each day!).

 Another reason is that Africa seems like "home" now; it is our not-so-new normal. So, great blog ideas don't spring as readily to my mind as they once did.  I forget that what may seem mundane to me might actually be interesting to someone who lives across the ocean.

Two examples  ........

  • I heard that a few of my students camped out last weekend, and that a group of large, male baboons woke them up (and scared them silly!) by poking the campers' backsides with sticks.  While this story amused me when I heard it, I didn't immediately think, "Oh!  What an amazing thing to happen!  I must blog about this!" 

  • Tim recently told me about a female patient from a neighboring country who is dying of cancer in the post-surgery ward and has no family nearby to stay with her.  She is slowly dying, all alone, in a foreign hospital, with overworked, understaffed nurses who cannot give her as much care as she needs and deserves.   She has no money, only one set of clothes, and must depend on the charity of strangers (other patients) who share their small amount of food with her.  In the "old" days, this woman's plight would have been a series of posts.  This time around, I only sigh, breathe a prayer for this suffering woman, pray for her aloud with Tim in the mornings, and wish life did not have to be so hard for so many.  But, no pictures.  No posts.  No fanfare. 

Part of blogging is sheer force of will and habit.  I'm asking God to help me get back on track.  But part of blogging - at least this blog - has been writing about new experiences and my processing of those experiences.  Since not much is new anymore, I find it harder and harder to write my thoughts.  

I believe that (slight) burnout or "missions fatique" may be another reason I do not blog as often as I once did.  Some things feel so painful for me to even think about that I just do not feel I have the energy to process them.  It seems much less exhausting to shove those experiences under the rug of my consciousness and not allow them to break my heart.   

I've learned that while this works in the short term, refusing to face hard things drains me more in the long run.  The experiences build and build and, next thing I know, I am angry at the world for being so unfair and maybe even angry at God for allowing His world to be so full of pain.

So, while I'm getting back on track......and on a happier note, I decided to show you a bit of what ministry looks like for me here in Kenya.

*not my actual students*

Teaching MKs -- what a JOY!!! These kids rock.  They really do.  Each has a different life perspective than the other -- each has rich stories to share about growing up in Tanzania, or Malawi, or South Sudan, or Kenya, or Rwanda or South Africa, etc. etc. etc.

Our first essay in my Senior English class, by necessity, is the College Essay.  Most choose to answer the first prompt from the dreaded Common App, which reads:

"Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story."

While I work at becoming a regular blogger again, I've invited any students who would like to do so to share their college essays with you.

I think you will enjoy reading the life stories of these missionary kids from all over the continent of Africa.  And, perhaps you'll glimpse a bit of what it looks like to serve as a "2nd tier missionary" here at RVA.  (I think I just made up that term - if not, I don't remember where I first heard it.)  What I mean by 2nd tier missionary is, I no longer serve on the front lines in a mission field, which is what I would consider 1st tier or front line missions.  

I now support front line or 1st tier missionaries all over the continent by teaching their children, so those 1st tier missionaries can STAY on the front lines and not need to return to the USA for their children's education.

Like you in the United States who support us and other missionaries financially, I feel that I am now in a more supportive role for missions to Africa.  My mission now is to support missionaries - and of course, to teach and love missionary kids.  Anyone who knows me knows I've loved teens my "job" comes pretty naturally to me these days! (At least, the "loving kids" part comes naturally - perhaps the "teaching British lit" part of my job requires a tad more effort!!)

I still get to do some 1st tier work, as we continue our work with Seka Handbags in Rwanda and help in some other ways in Kibogora, Rwanda and Idjwi Island, where our son, Deste, was born. 

But, primarily, I am now a missions supporter, just like you.  And, I love my role!  Just like you, this support is critical - without financial support from America, missionaries cannot continue to serve.  And without education for missionary children, missionaries cannot continue to serve, either.

So, without further ado, here is the first (of many, hopefully) MK stories from one of my students, who will remain nameless.  :-)
I added in the pictures. Those were not included on this MK's college app (though maybe that would be a great idea!).


College Application Essay - Prompt 1
Moving anywhere can be both exhilarating and terrifying; especially as a young child crossing continents and cultures. In 2005, two months before I turned five, my family moved from Boston, Massachusetts all the way across the world to Mombasa, Kenya. 

At the time, I was excited and as long as I had my family and my blanket, I was happy and didn’t see the significance of it and the effect it would have on my life. As time went on, however, and I began to understand and experience things more, the profound affect this change was having on my life suddenly became more apparent to me. 
Adapting to the culture was quite a learning experience for my family. Mombasa is such a mixing bowl of cultures and beliefs that it isn’t just learning about one people group’s customs. There are so many things to remember about how people of different backgrounds view certain things, things I would never have imagined had my family remained in Boston. For example, when we first came to Kenya we had to go to a language school for a while to learn Kiswahili. During this period, on a trip to town in a matatu (cheap public transportation) the van became way too full of people. Since my brother and I were so young and little we had to be passed through the windows to get out of the vehicle. It was a very interesting experience, to say the least. Another time, when I was a little bit older, I was with my family and some friends staying at some beachside cottages for a few days. After we had eaten lunch, I was munching on my favorite Indian snack and walking around. Suddenly, a monkey came out of the tree nearby and started chasing me.  Needless to say, I was completely mortified and scared out of my wits. As I was running, I began screaming for help but my laughing family found the whole situation quite amusing and kept yelling after me to drop the food. In the end, I didn’t drop the snack but my dad ended up scaring the monkey away with a stroller.
Another thing I would have never experienced if I had stayed in the USA is the annual Kenya Music Festival. This is where hundreds of students from all around Kenya come together to compete, both vocally and instrumentally. In the sixth grade I was both taking voice lessons and singing in the school choir. That year our school entered several categories, and I was in three of them: choir, operatic solo, and duet. The whole experience was quite exhilarating. I was quite surprised when the results were given to see that out of the hundreds of students who had competed, I had come fourth in every category in which I competed. That year in choir deepened my love for music and allowed me to see the many talented people in Kenya.
The only downside I’ve experienced from our move is that now, whenever our family visits the United States, my “home” country, I feel like I’m entering a different world, and that I am a stranger there.  Sometimes it’s hard to answer the questions “where is home?” and “where do you live?” The way I’ve grown up is so different than what could have been, but life is so much more colorful and diverse to me here. Some people may consider uprooting a young child’s entire world and altering the very definition of her life to be a terrible thing, but I know I wouldn’t be who I am today if I hadn’t been transplanted to Kenya at such an early age, and I really appreciate the opportunities that I’ve had to see the world through new eyes.

Monday, September 12, 2016

Senior Stress & Family Update

As Tim busily adds the finishing touches to his presentation for the surgery residents tomorrow, I'm reflecting on last weeks' classes in English 12.  My lesson plans said that we would be reading, discussing and analyzing more of Beowulf last week.....but, after watching the stressed out, worried faces of my students as they discussed college applications, I decided that Beowulf could wait, and that we would devote five days of class to facing those college app fears head on.  Since most of my students are boarding students, these kids don't have the benefit of parents at home with them each night, helping and advising and guiding them through the college application process.  And since I've already watched two of my own endure this tedious task, I couldn't sit back and not help these precious senior students, all so motivated yet mostly all so scared of the daunting process before them. 

College Resumes, Essays, Common App forms, Texas Common App forms (Can someone please explain to me why Texas feels we need our own separate common app?) -- you name it, we did it.

Honestly, I shake my head and sigh when I see all the additional hoops colleges have invented for these tired, nervous high school students to jump through since I was a high school senior applying to college.  My goodness!  College Admission people deflate all the air out of the ""Where am I going to go to college?" fun balloon, don't they?  I keep asking myself, "Do they really need to make it this difficult to apply to their school?"

Hopefully, those 5 class days were well spent, and now, I pray, some or all of those seniors can breathe a little easier at night, as most have moved much closer to being able to hit "send" on all those applications.

Meanwhile, we started week 3 of senior year, and are back to watching (reading) Beowulf kill the evil Grendel, and (soon, very soon), destroy Grendel's mama, too -- along with that pesky dragon that comes to ruin Beowulf's retirement plans years later.  As you know doubt remember, Beowulf is legendary in its ability to bore high school seniors across the Western Hemisphere to tears, and to cause them all to ask, "What in the world difference does this make to me?" So, I take it as my personal mission, my personal goal, to find a way to make this epic poem interesting and - dare I say it? - enjoyable for my students.  Perhaps I'll let you know later if I think I accomplished this feat of teaching...or not.

Besides teaching and doctoring, we are enjoying being with the 3/5 of the kids we have left at home, and trying not to be too sad about missing the older two who are away at college.  (Thank goodness for facetime and skype!  It always makes me feel so much better when I can see my Wheatie girl or my Aggie son on my computer or phone screen!)  Ruthie is a senior in high school this year.  I keep feeling like Steve Martin in the first "Father of the Bride" remake movie, looking at his grown daughter, but "seeing", in his mind's eye, a little girl with braided pigtails and bows.  I can't believe my little Ruthie is really going to graduate high school this year.  It just doesn't seem possible.  I'm enjoying getting to know the kids in her class - such sweet kids!  And, I'm also enjoying having Ruthie as a student!  What an honor.

Sam is just behind her as a junior.  He continues to revel in hanging out with his 10 or so best buds in his class.  Of all our kids, Sam definitely has enjoyed RVA the most, and I believe that is because of the wonderful young men in his class.  They have a bond like no other!  Sam is taking a videography class this year, and he loves it so far.  I'm thankful that RVA has so many great Art classes for Sam, as that is his passion. 

Little Desté grows more and more each day - he currently is making strides towards conquering his overwhelming fear of dogs.  His goal is to be able to go to his friends' homes - the ones who have dogs - by Christmas.  We'll see.  He's working on it!  Desté felt nervous about starting 1st grade - quite nervous.  But, he's taken to first grade like a fish to water.  He loves his teacher, absolutely adores her, in fact!  And, he is friends with every kid in class - they all get along so well together!  Tim and I are so thankful that Desté has adjusted so well to our family and his life here after all he's been through.  He does miss his Aunt Jeanne and his brother and sister on Idjwi - a lot.  Just the other day, he burst into tears, out of the blue, and said how much he missed them and wanted to go see them.  I'd love to be able to surprise him with a visit during a break this year - but it is kind of difficult for Americans to obtain visitor visas into Congo.  So, we'll be praying and working towards that.

So, nothing really insightful or deep this blog post, but wanted to at least write an update.  I'm trying to begin writing in here more regularly again - whether I feel inspired to say something profound or not.  Tonight was "not" - but at least now you have a picture of what's up here these days.

Feel free to comment or send us an email with your updates.  We love to hear from friends back home.  (

Sunday, August 28, 2016

John 3:16 and "Not my circus, not my monkeys"

 Well, hello there! 

I know, I've not blogged in ages.  Sorry about that. 

The problem with journals is, if you slack off for even a little time, the life stories keep adding up and adding up, stacking higher and higher in the writer's mind......causing said writer to procrastinate further due to the wrong belief that, "If I write now, I have to catch up on this, and this, and this......

Augh!  I will never have enough time to get caught up ...... or, maybe I will.....tomorrow.  Yes, I will do it tomorrow." 

Only, you know how that goes.  Tomorrow never, never comes.

So, today is the day that I wave the white flag of surrender to my perfectionistic thinking that tells me I have to chronicle every event in this blog.  I can't possibly catch up on our lives for the last year, except to say this:

We moved to Kenya.
 I teach senior English at Ruthie, Sam and Deste's school, Rift Valley Academy.
Tim is a professor of surgery with the PAACS surgery residency program at Kijabe Hospital.
Last year pretty much at our lunch.  Life was way too crazy, exhausting and -- oh, what an adjustment.

Tomorrow, school starts again for this year.  Our prayer is that we learn this year, through the to-do lists and busy schedules, how to discipline ourselves to live sane and healthy lives.  Burning the candle at both ends left us with no candle at all, and so our #1 priority this year is to trust God to show us what is essential and what is not, and to do the essential things, and let the rest slide.

Our relationship with Jesus is of course our #1 essential.  Without Him, nothing else matters and nothing else can be done with meaning.
#2 is time to invest in knowing each other.  We grow, we change, and yet.....if we don't keep spending time together each day (even a few minutes)......we end up feeling more like roommates or teammates rather than marriage partners.
#3 are the family relationships we have.  With 5 kids, my parents and siblings - that's a lot of people.
#4 are our jobs.

So, if you do pray for us and our ministry, our prayer request for this year is that we would go "back to the basics" and quit trying to be everything for everyone, but instead just rest in being God's children - and doing only what we are called by Him to do.

 So, what does this have to do with my post title? Well, I was meditating on this famous verse this morning, and thinking about how much I've taken for granted the fact that God the Father saw his people and knew we were without a prayer, without a hope, that we had HUGE problems we could not solve.  AND HE DECIDED TO GIVE UP HIS SON SO HE COULD FIX IT FOR US.
He knew the only way to help us out of our mess was to send his (one and only) son to save the day.......and He could have said, "Not my circus, not my monkeys", and would have been justified in saying so. 

We were the ones who chose our own way, who left God in the first place.  He could have just said, "Your problem.  Not mine.  You made your bed, now lie in it.  Goodbye.  Thanks for playing."

But he didn't.

Even though our problem, our huge, devastating, eternal nightmare problem was not God's problem at all.......even though we (the human race) had brought this problem on ourselves........God decided, out of LOVE for us, to make our problem His problem.  He decided to move heaven and earth to help us.  And to give his ALL to help us.  He didn't even spare his only son.  That's more than any parent can imagine being asked to give.

The World's coping mechanism system.  Kind of reminds me of Cain's famous line, "What?  Am I my brother's keeper?"


When I think of this, it not only fills me with gratitude, it also infuses me with a little less caution about guarding my priorities.  I've been focusing so much on how NOT to burn out, how NOT to become so exhausted, so depleted, so discouraged.......And Tim and I came up with our "plan" to be emotionally and spiritually healthy.  It basically involves building an invisible wall around our lives and saying NO to everything that isn't in our immediate circle of calling.

That's good and well......and I certainly need more of this - to remember I am fully human and cannot go and go and go and go and help and help and help and help without finally just imploding.

AND YET, it is also imperative to remember:  GOD GAVE HIS ONE AND ONLY SON.

God never says, "Not my circus.  Not my monkeys."

And, being one of those monkeys, I am SO glad he doesn't!

Does God want me to solve every problem that arises, everywhere and every time?  Of course not.  But might God call me his year to bear the burden of someone else?  To be a help to someone who needs love who officially is "not my circus, not my monkey"?  Yes.  I believe he might.

So, my quest this year is to LISTEN TO GOD'S VOICE, and not to harden my heart to the needs around me, even as I also try to rein myself in and safeguard my strength and time so that I have enough to give to my God and my family and myself.  Hardening my heart, resolutely saying "NO" every time, means I am trusting in my own strength to restore my tired heart.  I am depending on human methods to restore and refresh me.  "Just say NO" is the human mantra of how to protect ourselves. 

Yes, I do want to say NO a lot more often, I want to eradicate all I do that is not sent from Him, but I want to stay open to saying YES to anything He IS asking of me - because if He asks, I know it's good, no matter what. And if He asks, He will give me the strength and time to do it. 

So, prayers for our family this year?

  • Pray we adopt more God honoring boundaries around the time, money, relationships and energy He has given to us.  That I especially let God be God, and let me be just me. 
  • Pray we are used to bring His love and light to our areas of ministry. 
  • Pray our hearts would not be hardened to His voice as we seek to protect ourselves from exhaustion, but that we would have soft hearts towards Him and open ears to His voice. 
  • Pray that we can find a creative way to celebrate our upcoming Silver Anniversary (25!) this May 2 without spending too much money doing it.  (I know it's early, but the way time flies, we know we need to start planning now.)
  •  Pray for Deste's adjustment to 1st grade.  He's very nervous about going to school "all day", and doesn't know if he can survive it.  (Kinder was a half day program.) Pray also that he learns to read and can stay up with his class.  He is fiercely competitive and when he doesn't catch on to academic things, he becomes super discouraged.  He is very smart, but changing languages three times before age 6 put him rather behind on school type things.
  • Sam is entering his hardest year at RVA.  Junior year classes are tough, very tough - pray he can rise to the challenge, and yet still have time with all his buds.  Pray also for the time he invests teaching piano (Thanks, Verna Benham!).  He really loves his students and enjoys having a part time job.  Pray that God keeps using him and inspiring him in this area.
  • This is Ruthie's senior year.  She'll be a busy bee, applying to colleges (all Texas schools), taking SATs again, taking an online college class and participating in the many RVA classes and extra activities that make up senior year.  Pray for peace for her as she applies (decisions!  decisions!), pray for sizable financial aid to come in for college (we can always pray, right?),  and for God to direct her to HIS college choice - to just the right place for her.
  • Pray for our Aggie Son, Stephen, at (where else?) Texas A&M. He's thinking through possible career directions, and maybe changing majors, so needs lots of wisdom. Pray he gets the support he needs from someone local, since we the parents are 8,000 miles away. 
  • Hannah, our Wheaton English major, has just started classes and moved into a slightly larger dorm than she's had in the past. Wheaton does so many things so well - great classes, fabulous professors, delicious dining hall, beautiful campus. But their housing? Except for one large freshman dorm, the housing is a rollback to OUR 1970-1980 dorms, the kind we all suffered through. 😀Actually, her dorms have always been much worse than mine ever were. Think sardine can. With 4 students inside. There ya have it. Pray for Hannah - that she and her 3 dorm-mates can find creative ways to manage their limited space and to balance fun, "down time", and study time in a crowded situation - and also whether she will add another major (education) to her degree plan. 
  • Pray for Deste's biological siblings, Desange and Tubunduru, who still live on Idjwi island.  We were not aware that he had siblings when we adopted him, and we probably could never adopt them now.  We do pray for them, and send them to school and provide some support for food and clothing and such, although not nearly as much as we'd like.  Please pray for them, for health, for growth, for opportunities, and most of all, to know that they are loved by a God who never, ever says, "I'm too tired to help you, I am too overwhelmed.  I can't take anything else on." So thankful that we have a God of endless strength, endless love, endless caring.  Please pray that our mighty, magnifacent God will be an everlasting help to Deste's relatives on the Island of Idjwi.   
  • Please pray that two interns could be found - possible Business major or minor students and/or fashion design students - who would commit to spending 3-6 months in Kibogora, Rwanda, to befriend the Seka ladies, teach them, doing Bible studies with them, and setting up some systems (standardized purse making, shipping, 501c3 status, etc) so that Seka can become self sufficient eventually.  We really believe that Seka was a ministry that God called us to start, but if we don't get some tangible help in this way, we are unsure how much longer Seka can continue.  :( 
Thanks for reading.  Sorry this was so long.  I will TRY to update weekly so I don't need to write such long posts in the future.

We'd love to hear how you are doing!  Shoot us an email:

Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Guest Post

I just checked our giving, and it looks like donations to our mission are down.  Yet, I also recently read a blog post by a man we follow named Simon Guillebaud, who has worked for many, many years in Burundi, a kind of "sister country" to Rwanda.  Burundi is now officially the poorest country on earth - not a great #1 spot to claim. 

Simon wrote about an opportunity to help a school that is making a significan positive difference in Burundi in his blogpost today.  "Discovery School" is in need of a new (used) school bus.  

I pray that anyone who still reads my blog - I've obviously lost many readers due to my lack of ever writing - will pray for Discovery School Burundi and will donate something, even $5, to their school bus fund.  

If you think you've got a tough row to hoe, simply google "Burundi", and you'll soon realize how blessed you are.  These are our brothers and sisters.  Please help if you can!  Thanks.  

Read Simon's post here: 

Simon's Post about Discovery School in Burundi

He has shown you
what is good, 
and what 
the LORD requires of you.
To act justly
To love mercy
To Walk humbly with your God. 

Micah 6:8 

Sunday, April 3, 2016

? H ? O ? M ? E ?

I call so many places "HOME".  I think the word has partially lost its meaning for me from overuse.

When I'm finishing my teaching day in my classroom at RVA, packing up to walk back to our house, the place we eat and sleep, I say, "I'm going home".  

When I pack my suitcases to head to the airport, board a jet and fly 8,000 miles to the USA, I say, "I'm going home".

After I've visited a while, or done whatever I came to the States to do, I pack bags again, head to the airport and fly back to Africa.  Yep.  As I do that, I say, "I'm going home".

Tim and I are in the middle of selling our home, the building in which we ate, slept, educated our children, played, worked and stored a whole slew of things for 16 years.  When I sleep at my parents' home, wake up and prepare to drive there to sort through more boxes, I tell my parents that "I'm going home" to do some packing.

At the end of the packing workday, I tell myself, "I'm too tired to work anymore.  I think I'll go home now." Meaning, "I think I will go to my parents' home, the home where I spent my high school years".

But, none of these places are really my home.

Home implies belonging, permanence, a resting place, a place of total nurture and love and growth.

No home on this earth is really home completely, is it? Our homes here are mere whispers of our final home.  We will finally go home one day, and what a homecoming that will be.

I get excited when I think of it.  And when I think of friends we've made in Rwanda and Kenya who have no real home on this earth -- I think of how special it will be for them to be welcomed HOME at last.

Please be praying for our family, please hold us in your thoughts as we say goodbye to a home that we once naively thought would be ours until we died or entered a nursing home.  Today I smelled one of Tim's rosebushes, and the happy memories of times shared there together came flooding into my mind, one after the other after the other.

Transitions are painful, and this one is no different than the rest.  Adjustments must be made, reality must be faced.  We would gladly trade things for people -- comfort for our call -- but still, I notice my fists are closed, holding onto something, not wanting to say goodbye to a home that was good to us.

The guilt I feel for taking away my children's childhood home (and schoolroom) swells as a weight in my chest, almost like someone is stepping on me just below my throat.  Breathing becomes difficult.

Selling the love seat (which is so old and worn out!  It used to be in Tim's little brother's dorm room, way back in the early 80s!) which I reupholstered twice and which used to sit in our baby nursery, on which I nursed all four of my biological children, where they later came and sat beside me as I read books to them --- it feels like I am ripping off my arm.

Yet why am I complaining?  This was a choice we made.  You can't have your cake and eat it, too.  Holding onto a house we can no longer afford, when a buyer came our way without our even putting it on the market.......this was a gift from God.  And we realize that.  Yet, change is hard.

Lakewood Drive, I will miss you.  Thanks for the memories.

Thank you for reading.  

Thursday, December 10, 2015

Advent Fun

Here in Kijabe, the mission community enjoys a tradition of rotating houses each night of Advent for a short, sweet and special Advent activity. One night, we might meet at a British family's house to make colorful paper chains to put on our Christmas trees, another evening, we might meet in a German home to create lovely German 3D paper stars. 

Last night, we journeyed to the Australian-American merger home of the  Steere family for a rollicking-fun Kijabe-Christmas Carol creation competition. 

The game, affectionately stolen from the American home of the (currently stateside) Myhre family, involves teams brainstorming together to write new words about celebrating Christmas time in the unique ways we do in Kijabe, and singing our masterpieces to familiar Christmas carol tunes. 

Deste and I were a team, and our song was sung to the tune of "Away in a Manger". We titled it, "Away in Kijabe". 

We had more fun singing and giggling our way through that song, singing away!
Here is the original, scratch through a and all. 

What fun to get to see Christmas through the eyes of a little child - and even through the eyes of one for whom ALL is still brand new and fresh. Deste loves all things Christmas, including the wonder and joy of the true Christmas story, the silly and fun myths of flying reindeer and jolly elves (though he passionately reminds me every single day: "Santa isn't real, Mom. Don't forget the REAL reason for Christmas!"), watching the Grinch who stole Christmas and Elf movies, decorating a tree, stringing Christmas lights, hanging stockings, Christmas gift wishes, making paper snowflakes, and so much more. 

I promised some kids on another team that I would post the other song entries, so here they are below. Meanwhile, I hope you are having a happy Advent as well! 

Monday, November 30, 2015

Joy Comes in the Morning

Thank you for praying for me!

I "know" many people must have been praying for me since I wrote that last depressing blog post.....I began feeling better within just a few hours of publishing it.  

Wow.  I did not write the post as an experiment in the value of honesty, but if I did, it would have shown honesty really IS the best policy.  

How can a friend help if someone will not say what they need?  How can I help a friend if I do not know my friend needs something?

While I felt hesitant and a bit embarrassed to admit how tired, lousy and bereft of joy I felt on such a normally festive day, I am now glad I said it.  

The end of the story is this:  I do not feel sad any more!  Yay! 
We packed up our stuff and got almost everything in the house on Saturday.  Went up there this morning (Monday) for the last few items, and now we're all in!  Sunday morning, Tim made a fire, and I made coffee for us to drink on the front porch, which includes a luscious view of Mt. Longonot.  Not thirty seconds after I sat, all cozy in my wicker chair, I noticed the faint outlines of a rainbow starting to appear.  Within a few minutes, it became a vibrantly colored, clear-as-a-bell double rainbow! My iphone didn't capture the second rainbow very well at all, but it was there. 

Coincidence?  Nah.  I doubt that very much.  

God came and hugged me tightly Sunday morning, whispering to me through that rainbow, "It will be okay, my child.  I am still here.  You have my promise.  I will always be with you.  It's going to be okay.  I know you're tired, but you'll get some rest now.  And, you're going to enjoy your new house, by the way."  

Since seeing that rainbow, my heart feels like it has grown three sizes, just like the Grinch who (tried to) steal Christmas.  I am still not finished grading, but I've even conquered some of those essays. 

So, thank you for praying for me.  Please let me know how I can pray for you, too.